I have had an innate fascination with Google Adsense and the correct spelling of monetization for a while.
Countless times, I was poised to hit the ‘Unsubscribe’ button while hovering over John Chow’s blog. But every single time, I stopped myself. Is this guy for real ? Is he really making thousands of dollars every months from blogging ? Does he really eat in those posh restaurants ?
This decision to place banner ads and a sponsored search box on this site was not taken lightly and sincere apologies to all my principled, minimalist, long-standing, traditionalist readers.
Rest assured, the banner ads will only remain in place until I have raised the sum of £70 to pay for a replacement bathroom door in my Prague hotel room
After a mere 10 minutes, my newly created Adsense account was unbelievably showing an incredible return of $0.34. If this income stream is sustained, I calculate I will have generated $14,000 (£7,300) within one month and £87,000 in my first year !
However, on reflection, I assume this surge in activity was caused by my lengthy trials and tribulations with the WordPress plugin and getting the confounded advertisements to display properly on the footer.
These experiments (767 clicks all by me) probably constituted a breach of the Adsense Terms and Conditions so now I have the mighty Google suing me as well as Amazon. Sigh.
Anyway, back to the original reason for the need to raise some capital quickly. This evening, when I returned to room 516, I was informed by reception that there is a small dent in the bathroom door. I thanked them for letting me know, said it was no problem and they could fix it tomorrow morning.
Unfortunately, events then took a bizarre and sinister twist when the head of housekeeping maintained I must have been responsible as the hole wasn’t there prior to me checking in.
However, I am not so sure. Honestly, I can not recall kicking the door in a fit of pique, my feet don’t hurt and my toes are not bruised. Still, the evidence is stacked against me.
Unless I can stage a CrimeWatch style reconstruction, tomorrow morning, to prove that a maid’s trolley laden with shampoo, lemon scented body wash and fresh flannels was forcefully rammed into the door by a disaffected and underpaid employee, I am in a very weak position.
Worse, I am told that I will have to foot the bill for a replacement door which costs £70.
Now I have occasionally expensed room service, wireless internet, movies, laundry and sundries but submitting an expense report including ‘Broken Bathroom Door’ might be pushing it.
Still, with my Adsense revenues, I won’t be shelling out for a cheap pastel blue door made from MDF, I’ll be buying the hotel.