‘Is she a werewolf ?

‘No’.

‘Does she have the ability to spontaneously transform into a fierce animal ?’

‘No’.

‘Is she a robot ?’

‘No’.

‘Is she a very early version of a robot that is running version 1.0.1 (alpha) of the software that meant she lost to that human-robot hybrid ?’

‘No’

‘Is she a normal human but just set 200 years in a post-apocalyptic world where water, fuel and sunlight are at a premium ?’

‘No’.

‘Is she a clone of that other slightly built but attractive girl who looks identical except for the hairstyle ?’

‘No’.

‘Is she an alien masquerading on earth as a normal human ?’

‘No’

‘Is she Sarah Millican ?’

‘Yes’.